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beyourownkind

2023, it's been...

I tend to overuse ellipses, but this time, it's appropriate. Although my spellcheck is always against me using them, I am not quite sure how I should sum up this year. At the start of the year, I was offered a job that would cause my husband and me to relocate back to our home city, Chicago. At first, when I received the news, I was over the moon until I realized we would be relocating. Although I am a Gemini, I do not swiftly adapt. I thought it would be different because I was returning home, but that was not the case. I had been living in Lafayette, IN, for six years. It's a small city, which made me forget how to watch my surroundings, you know, the stuff that comes along with living in a city. Suddenly, the city I left behind was so loud and filled with angry drivers who rushed to the red light. The nights were louder, and I had to remember to lock stuff.





On the flip side, I was in love with all of the activities, and I was outside, baby! I attended 3-4 concerts, overloaded on pop-ups, and spent time with my family and friends I missed in the city. Because the move was so sudden, we moved in with my mom, and I felt like Benjamin Button and grew backward in my head. My mom is one of those cool moms, so it's not all bad; I just think at age 40, sometimes it's too many queens in the house, lol. However, I am humbled and grateful to have a mom who would open her door to my family; this is precious time I have spent with her.

This summer, my last grandma alive passed away. It got me thinking about my parents more as I have watched them mourn their parents. Although all of my grandmas surpassed 80 years old, I am sure they would still say that life is too short. As I thought about the importance of time, I wondered about my life choices and all the time I wasted overthinking or obsessing about things that don't matter.



My Three Grandmothers, R.I.P.


With this in mind, I decided to tackle my weight, although it mostly tackles me. I joined a weight loss program that I was killing it the start, and then I fell off. Ironically, I did not fall off too hard because I found myself attending a gym, and I could not eat as much as I used to. So I am fitting into clothes I could not wear earlier in the year, yet I am not celebrating. The lack of confetti being thrown in the air stems from how I view myself. If you ask most people who know me, they would have fantastic things to say about me, and I accept them, but I don't get it. I am not saying that I think I am horrid of a person, but I don't see myself as I believe I should. In my head, I've accomplished nothing when in reality, I've done a lot of stuff. Not to debby down this post, I learned that I have to be kinder to myself, patient with myself, and work from the inside out. I could lose all of the weight and still not feel beautiful simply because my mind wouldn't accept it. Once again, I wasted time on thoughts that conflicted with my best self instead of walking in my greatness.





Another thing I realized is I really like being outside. I had the luxury of throwing three BYOK events this year, and they were amazing. I met so many great people this year. One was Meosha Thomas, who rented her space at Port Ministries for me to have my events. Also, she provided business consulting for several months, which tremendously helped me, and she shared lots of wisdom and jokes. Another person I met was Porchae Londone, who was a light to hang with, and she has the coolest job that affords her to travel frequently. I reconnected with an old friend, Jacynthia Thomas, and she was such an inspiration and helped me a lot personally and with my platform. I am so proud of her for embarking on an entrepreneurial journey of her own. I was so elated to hang out with my sister-friends, Demetria, Kimberly, Asha, Candice, and my brother-friend, Darnell. I missed them so much.



Behind the Masks Event



Art & Affirmation Event



Queensgiving Event


Within that business consultation with Meosha, the Sister's Closet was born, which involves purging our closet and gifting those things to someone else. Most of them were held at our events, and the December items were donated to Simpson Academy for Young Women. I am so grateful for all the ladies who donated to all four of my sister's closets, and I look forward to continuing it in 2024.







So much good happened this year, and a bit of needed chaos. It was needed because it reshaped my perspective of how I am and how my choices affect those around me. At the end of the year, I became a more attentive wife, patient daughter, better friend, and nicer to myself. It's not that I have arrived, but with daily work, it would only get better from here.


2023 was filled with laughter, new adventures, new friendships, new revelations, old revelations returning, reconnections, disconnections, ugly cry prayers, ugly cry praises, and most importantly, fellowship with dope family, friends, and associates. This year was a tossed salad of many things that shaped and prepared me for the upcoming year.


Don't be Shy? How was your year? What are some of the things you learned this year?


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