One day at work I was training with a coworker and the conversation veered off into another subject. I caught myself probably talking too much while being trained and interrupted my babbling by saying “I’m sorry, I’m just a talkative person. I’m sorry for being so annoying.” So normally people just laugh it off and continue but he says “You’re not annoying me, you’re entitled to be you.”
I thought to myself, ” I’m entitled to me?” I mean I knew to some degree that all I could be is me but throwing the word “entitled” meant something to me. Entitlement means having the right to do something. Meaning we are all privileged to be. If this is the case, why do so many of us feel so apologetic for being us? How is it offensive to another person for having your opinion or speaking up for yourself?
As always I have to add the caveat, by stating if you purposefully hurt someone’s feelings or cause physical harm to others and don’t show remorse that is not living life unapologetically. That is living vilely and indicative of something that needs to personally dealt with. I feel that some people take the whole “living unapologetically” as a way to not hold themselves accountable for their actions. Some people play victim and make people feel they are entitled to jump for them. Living unapologetically does not omit empathy and does not literally mean you can go around doing whatever you want to others without remorse.
Living unapologetically simply means you do not owe anyone an explanation for being you. My co-worker validated this point and I interpreted this as even if you’re annoying me you don’t owe me an apology because you’re just being you. That may seem like nothing to someone else but it spoke volumes to me. It was so loud to my soul that I had to share it with someone else. There are people out there that may be suffocating simply because they are holding in their air. No it’s not a typo, I meant air. When you are bottling up who you are you are unable to comfortably live your desired life. This suffocation takes over your mind as you have to constantly put up facades to keep up with this other person you invented. After years of this suffocation process you internally turn blue and are now living up to that term “dying inside”. You are dying to who you really are because you have put so much energy in the person you created.
But all is not lost, you can resuscitate your individuality. This process can be reversed because you are physically alive. Every morning you rise you are given the right to embrace your true self. That right can never be taken away because remember, it’s an entitlement. You can take the necessary steps to resuscitating by first accepting who you are, the strong points and the weak points. You have to accept all of it. If you accept all of it no one can shame you for being you. My talkativeness can be both be a strong and a weak point. At that moment, it was disruptive and I had to catch myself. Because I know that I’m talkative I was self aware I might have been talking too much. My coworker just excused this behavior by allowing me my entitlement. But the point is I was aware.
Self-awareness is important and it is pushed on us as people to learn our strengths about us and not our weaknesses. Both sides are what makes us the person we are. I pretty sure we will be working on certain areas of our life, but let’s work on them because we decided to and not because others pressured us to. And with these changes let’s be patient with ourselves because change is not overnight. You will still make mistakes but that’s your human right. No one is perfect and that includes you. Alleviating perfection is freedom. And it allows you to mentally breathe. I feel the word perfection is a symptom of these mental suffocations as we desire to be perfect for our parents and our friends and don’t forget the neighbor across the street. This pressure is simply unnecessary. Just remember with this entitlement you are allowed imperfection.
I believe we all serve a purpose and it is difficult to serve our purpose if we not our true selves. The very thing you think is odd about you may be the very thing that touch others. My knack to talk led me to this blog and although I don’t have a large following my hope is touch at least one person in the world that have turned mentally blue. And to that person I encourage them to walk in their identity so they can live out their purpose and stop robbing the world of their greatness. The world needs you to make the difference you were destined for. Remember, you don’t have to be famous to be a hero as you never know whose life you are touching when shining your light.